Feeling Down? You're Not Alone
So many times in life I've felt strong. And so many other times, completely helpless and beyond myself in knowing how to carry on to the next moment.
The last 8 months are no exception. I think everyone has felt down at some point this year. For some people, that got worse this past week with the election. For others, it sparked hope they haven't felt for 4 years.
Whether we agree with either of those emotions, the truth is, we all struggle at times and that struggle is often related to our circumstances.
Circumstances..
* at work
* at home
* with friends
* in our country
* with health
The opportunities for hard things in life are endless. That's what it means to be on earth: a fallen, broken, sinful world.
Jesus on Struggles
Jesus acknowledged this truth in John 16:33. "I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”
Yet, perhaps you're an optimist like me and keep hoping things will get better. That peace will reign in this world.
If we know Jesus, we have peace within, but even so will never have peace from without for any length of time while on this side of heaven. So, what do we do with that? What do we do when the struggle gets old?
I've explained it like walking through each day through a swamp. You keep moving forward, but each step takes great effort.
Other words for this are:
Depression.
Melancholy.
Dysthymia.
Something I'm going to take a while stab at and say almost everyone has dealt with at one time.
Some Christians still believe these shouldn't exist in a believer. That we're not strong enough or have enough faith or doing enough to beat emotional downturns.
However, I think scripture is full enough of all emotions that it's clear God is not surprised, disappointed, or angry at us for feeling down.
Even when it lasts a long time.
That doesn't mean we don't engage in the battle. No. On the contrary, we want to dig in and fight harder. But to be successful in the fight, we need to wield some different weapons.
Weapon #1: Prayer
The first is prayer.
We are prone to either swallow and try to ignore our emotions or take them to another human. Instead, our first step should be to take them to the Lord.
This is one thing I love about the Psalms. David takes every single emotion he has to God. He doesn't shy away from grief, sorrow, joy, regret, praise, or even depression. He is a model for praying through the most difficult of times.
As a matter of fact, sometimes when I can't come up with the words, I go to the Psalms and seek out one that fits where I am and speak those words (sometimes out loud, sometimes silently - there are no rules to talking with the Lord). Then I stand confident that God knows my heart.
What I'm not always good at in those moments is pausing and getting quiet to listen to the Lord. This is an essential part of prayer. Oh, I know that He's speaking to me through scripture, but He also wants to whisper into our hearts. It's in these moments that we're equipped to make it to the next moment, next hour, next day.
The Lord desires that we come to Him. He has and is willing to provide us everything we need. Even in our deepest, darkest, most difficult moments.
The main thing He provides is Himself. He is not just the source of our strength. He is our strength. Likewise, He's not only our source of joy. He is our joy.
Going to God in prayer is like drinking from a well when parched. We fill up on the living water and He carries us through this moment to the next.
Weapon #2 - Other Believers
Just because God wants us to come to Him first doesn't mean that He never wants us to share our burdens and struggles with other people. Good research and science doesn't support this, but most importantly, neither does scripture.
We see this in many places, such as in 2 Corinthians and Romans.
God gives us each other to comfort each other, lament with each other, rejoice with each other, and encourage each other.
To fulfill all these roles, we have to be open and honest about what we're going through and share that with each other.
That doesn't mean you spill your whole heart to the whole world.
We should be discerning with whom we confide. Who we go to for advice and guidance. Even empathy and compassion.
Some people, even believers, are better equipped to help give what we need at any given moment than others. That doesn't mean they're lacking in their own faith or maturity (although, sometimes this is the case), but that God didn't equip them to serve that particular role.
So, don't become an ostrich when you're down and struggling. Reach out. Ask for prayer. Meet a friend for coffee or schedule a phone call. It may be the hardest thing to do, but an important part of healing and moving forward.
Weapon #3 - Do it Anyway
Have you heard the phrase that courage is doing something afraid? Well, sometimes we not only have to do things we're afraid of, but things we don't feel like doing. And I'm not talking necessarily about just not feeling like doing something. Often, it's more than that.
It may feel impossible to muster the energy to do that thing.
You may feel exhausted at just the thought of doing that thing.
Or you may actually have to take a nap after accomplishing that task that's been staring at you for longer than you care to admit.
I struggle in this area the most. Well, actually I struggle in each of these areas.
I'm not writing this just for you. I'm writing it for me. This is where I am right now, and truth be told, have been for a while. And I want to do better. I want to be better. I want to rejoice in the Lord always.
If Paul could do it in prison, then I can do it in a world of mask mandates, social distancing at church, and restrictions we never could have imagined 12 months ago.
Truth is, this isn't the hardest thing I've gone through in the last 2 years. I'll still take 2020 over 2019.
For our family, 2019 had some really wonderful highlights, but it also had it's fair share of loss, grief, and even trauma.
What I'm realizing is I never had the chance to process all that before the chaos of Covid, racial tensions, riots, and a ridiculous presidential race whirled in like a tornado inside a hurricane accented by an earthquake, volcano eruption, and raging fire.
Oh, right a few of those were actually thrown into 2020, too.
But I digress.
Life is hard. At times it feels unbearable. God give us many resources to help us get through them. Not the least of which is each other.
Weapon #4 - Take Care of Yourself
Self-care has had two things happen to it.
* In some ways it's been overused, encouraging people to place an unhealthy focus on themselves.
* Often, especially in Christian circles where we know we're supposed to take care of each other, it gets neglected.
Let's aim for balance. Taking steps to take care of ourselves, yes, even love ourselves, so that we can be in a place to fulfill the plans God has made for us.
What do I mean by self care? I mean:
* Take care of yourself physically
* Take care of yourself mentally
* Take care of yourself emotionally
* Take care of yourself spiritually
Not necessarily in that order.
A couple of these we've already covered. Prayer, reaching out, and pushing through are part of this paradigm of self-care. But there are many things we can do each day to help set ourselves up for success.
To get more specific with some suggestions on how to do this:
- Move your body, even if it's just a 15-minute walk or stretching session
- Journal, draw, color, write, or do something else artistic that helps you process
- Eat healthier
- Take a break from social media
- Give yourself grace
This is by no means an exhaustive list. We don't have space for that here. But hopefully it'll help get you started.
A great site with even more specific suggestions and resources for mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical health I've greatly benefitted from is the Biblical Nutritionist. There's a host of information practical tips and tools aimed at helping you.
Weapon #5 - Do Good
I heard a great sermon this past weekend that focused on this concept, but it's one I've believed in and touted for a long time.
When we're struggling, one of the best ways to get better is to look outside of ourselves, recognize someone else's trial, and do something for them.
I don't know about you, but in Covid-world, I've felt very limited in what I can do for other people. I mean, there's a small circle of people that it's easy for me to bless, but there are so many more in my outer circles who I know could use encouragement. That's why I'm trying to find more creative ways to be a blessing.
Especially right now when I don't feel like it. While I'd rather become a hermit and bury myself in a pile of books.
What can we do for others?
- Send an encouraging note
- Take a meal
- Put together a goody basket
- Text or call to check on them
- Order a small, but special gift
I'm sure there are other things I'm not including. (If you have some more ideas, I'd love to hear them!) Hopefully, though, this is a good start for you.
You Are Not Alone
Does that encourage you? I hope so!
Sometimes the worst part of feeling down is feeling alone.
Do you ever want to give up on people in your darkest moments?
I haven't felt that too often in my life, but I'll be completely transparent and admit that's how I was feeling earlier today. For a host of reasons, I was just done making an effort.
But this is the exact opposite as to how God would have me respond to my current situation and circumstances.
If I gave up on others, stopped being considerate, and working on relationships, I'd be the one who'd lose the most.
And Satan would win.
In those moments, I dug deep and did some informal praying (just talking to myself and to God and working through it all), and He made it clear the path for me to take.
And reminded me of the all-important truth that He loves me.
Some days, I don't know why, but am grateful for it always.
Just this one fact is enough for me to praise Him and rejoice always.
I won't give up. Not in my own strength will I continue, but in His.
When I am disappointed, doubtful, and discouraged, I will turn to Him. I will remind myself of His truths. I will dig in and do what I know works.
I hope you won't give up either.
Take a deep breath. Breath out the world. Breath in God. Then ask Him to help you and trust that He will.
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